How do you know if the porn is sex positive?

8 Apr

Essin’Em (a really awesome sex-positive kinky blogger) recently posted a contest for a free porn from Good Releasing if people can describe what sex positive porn is without resorting to “I know it when I see it”.  I found it surprisingly difficult to do.  It’s easy to list things that often appear in self-labeled sex-positive porn (piercing, queer sexuality, kink, plot, etc.), but it’s a lot harder to say that those things are what make the porn sex positive.  Almost any (white, able-bodied) girl can diet herself down, get inked and pierced and start working at Suicide Girls, but it doesn’t mean that her experiences in the industry  and her personal feelings about her work will be sex-positive.

So how then do we know if the porn we watch is sex-positive?  In general, I look for porn that shows the natural humanity of the people involved.  For example, I look for porn that includes lots of different types of people showing off their own natural sexy selves.  I look for porn that includes people over 30, people who aren’t a size 2, people with small breasts, people with small cocks, people with different looking cunts, gender transgressors, and sexual acts that don’t follow the typical blow job to cum shot pattern.  It’s not that big cocks, thin girls with big boobs, and cum shots aren’t sexy, it’s just that (with very few exceptions) this is the only way we get to see people being sexual.

I also look for porn that has smiling, not just because I think smiling is one of the sexiest things on the planet, but also because it’s really easy to spot a fake smile.  When I see porn stars with comfortable, happy, genuine smiles it says to me that they’re having a really good time and I LOVE watching porn with people who are having a really good time.

When I see these things it says to me that the people are showing off their own, natural sexuality… not what we’re told is supposed to be sexy. They all look more natural and more comfortable than most of the folks in mainstream.  When they seem natural, it makes me feel that they have a positive view of their sexuality and it usually makes me feel better about my sexuality too.  Even if their kink isn’t my kink, if they’re having a really good time, it’s probably going to turn me on.When I see these things it says to me that the people are showing off their own, natural sexuality… not what we’re told is supposed to be sexy. They all look more natural and more comfortable than most of the folks in mainstream.  When they seem natural, it makes me feel that they have a positive view of their sexuality and it usually makes me feel better about my sexuality too.  Even if their kink isn’t my kink, if they’re having a really good time, it’s probably going to turn me on.

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